By now, you should already know of the discussions pertaining to Mr. Ralph Richard Banks and his book, "Is Marriage for White People?" If you don't, feel free to google him at your leisure or click on the following link: Is Marriage for White People?
Mr. Ralph Richard Banks with wife Jennifer and 3 sons.
Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, this man is saying have been the sentiments I have echoed throughout my last 2 years at University as an undergraduate. I cannot tell you how much I was ostracized and maligned by people within the African American student body (both black men and women). The very same student body I had dedicated my first 2 years to uplifting and supporting with my involvement in various clubs that had a predominantly African American membership and focus. The backlash from the so called "African American (Pseudo) Community" being dished to Mr. Banks is no surprise. In fact, I plan on personally writing this man a thank you letter for taking the time to do the research on such a delicate issue. What is more, he has done it from an objective viewpoint. One that does not come with loads of pre-concieved notions or ideologies about what is the "right" way for black women to lead their lives on the romantic front.
I have searched for videos featuring Mr. Banks discussing the book and am annoyed to say the least, at how many black women are being vocal about the wrong things. I have seen videos and snippets of black women sounding off on their desire for "black love," their feelings of insecurity and discomfort with black men dating outside of their race, etc. Could someone please zip these women's mouth closed and throw away the key? (mild venting about to commence) I cannot say it enough, when black women like that become excessively vocal, it results in damaging our image as evolved young black women. I urge all to not be afraid to speak up about how we as young black women determined to live well could care less about the love lives of black men, whether they involve women of another race or not. We all know that there is no such thing as a man shortage because we have always and will always consider ourselves to be a part of a global village; a global village with an abundance of eligible quality men that are more than eager to marry women like ourselves. We also know there truly is nothing to fear or feel ashamed of when it comes to dating men outside of our race. Our ancestral heritage loudly declares that our crowns have been paid for and we have every right to wear it with pride. As Evia always says, Mate Out or Die Out! We as Young Black Women Determined to Live Well are already prepped and primed to MATE OUT.
Any chance or opportunity I get, I plan on making my voice heard, as it is full time for women like us to show our views and how they strikingly contrast with that of the less evolved black women that keep us down with their outdated and self-defeating mentalities. I stand firm in my belief that black women should always put themselves first no matter what. We are not mules, breeding incubators for black out of wedlock children, nor are we asexual bastions of the black race. We are women first, and with that comes the responsibility to ensure that we take advantage of every opportunity within our reach to lead fulfilling lives. Solving the problems of systemic racism towards black men is not our fight. That is a process that will take decades if not centuries to undo. Meanwhile our lives should remain on hold?! I think not! People better get a clue quick. We are unstoppable, and mean business when it comes to our well-being. We are resolute in our convictions for success and steadfast in making it a reality. Keep on with the keeping on ladies! It's our time now!